You Can Keep Your Coat On
by Pimpface
Summary: Dr Horrible's plan fails and he's captured by Hammer. Looking for a quick escape, Horrible does something they both don't expect and Hammer is more than happy to oblige.


**Title:** You Can Keep Your Coat On

**Fandom: **Dr Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog

**Pairing:** Captain Hammer / Dr Horrible

**Rating: **NC-17 / M

**Word Count: **3951

**Summary:** Dr Horrible's plan fails and he's captured by Hammer. Looking for a quick escape, Horrible does something they both don't expect and Hammer is more than happy to oblige.

**Warning:** Shit summary and Man on Man buttsex!

**Quick note:** This was written for the lovely :icon: because they are AWESOME and sooo waaaay too nice to me! I love you! XD I know you wanted plot and stuff but this was as much as I could handle haha! Uuuugh I suck... and I know you like fluff so I made this one extra fluffy :D yay! Hope you like it! Enjoy~! 3

The bad Doctor strummed his fingers on the desk in front of him and sighed as he awaited the grand entrance of the less than grand hero. He flicks his eyes to the computer screen and sighs again as the image flickers slightly. He leans over and smacks it with a grunt. The screen flickers again momentarily before going completely black, he rose to his feet and gave it a hearty thwack, the screen flashes awake again and the image of the hero running around looking for a door reappears. "Stupid junk..." He grumbles to himself before slumping back down into his chair.

He would be loving the fact that he managed to hide the door to his new lair so well if it hadn't been for the fact that the idiot faux-hero had already, accidentally, managed to foil his plan. In his anger, Hammer had punched the wall and several other nearby objects, one of which being the large satellite dish that had been transmitting his signal to the dynamite wired into the dam, thus rendering him at a loss.

So, now, all he has to do is wait for the idiot to finally find the door and arrest him, or to just get frustrated and give up. What he didn't expect, was for Hammer to get frustrated, give up and then to make his own door by punching his way through the thin layer of brick that made Horrible's left wall.

Horrible lifted an arm to shield his face from the blast as brick went flying everywhere. He leapt to his feet and started flailing his arms around. "Hey! Do you know how much that's going to cost to fix? First you don't let me rob a bank and now you're breaking walls. Fighting you actually costs me money!-" His rant was soon cut off by thick digits wrapping around his throat.

"Well, you know what they say, Evil pays." Hammer beamed out, his smile full of sunshine as he easily lifted the Doctor from the floor with one hand. Horrible would have pointed out that the comeback made no sense, but the fingers surrounding his throat tightened on his windpipe. "Now, Doctor Horrible, tell me your evil scheme." Hammer demanded, raising an obviously plucked eyebrow.

Horrible stared at him. How could he? The great Captain and his stupid fingers wouldn't let him. His fingers scratched at the large hand wrapped around his throat and his legs kicked out as his mouth flapped, hopping that would be enough of indication.

Of course, it wasn't.

"Not going to talk, aye? Well, I have ways of making you talk." Captain Hammer said menacingly.

Doctor Horrible dead-paned. Could this guy really be that stupid? He nodded frantically and rolled his eyes as though to say "Yes, obviously." But not enough to that he implied the man supporting his weight at quite a height would feel offended and possibly either a) drop him, or b) beat him up even further.

The doctor couldn't do anything but wince and wait for the repercussions of his evil plan. After a pregnant pause he finally opens his eyes again and is surprised when his vision is filled with the smirking face of one Captain Hammer. His brows knitted and he pressed his lips into a thin line.

Captain lowered the Doctor to the ground and slipped his fingers looser. He slid them round to the back of his throat, lessening their grip even more, threading his gloved fingers in the soft thatch of hair at the nape of his neck and yanked. He stared deep into Horrible's incredulous baby blues and his smile only widened. "Ready to talk yet?"

Doctor Horrible coughed as he took in several of strong lungfulls of air and wrapped his long fingers around Hammers thick forearm muscles to steady himself. He opened his mouth and willed words to come out of his sore throat, he swallowed down as much saliva as he could before fruitlessly trying again.

"Still not talking, huh? Well then I- what?" Hammer's confident smirk was replaced by a confused frown as he watched one of Horrible's hands move up to his face and make a shushing motion with his lips.

Horrible clamped his fingers back around those strong muscles and leant his head forward onto Hammer's right shoulder. He swallowed around the thick lump rising in his throat and forced the words out. "You. Won. Already." He managed out between gasped breaths, his voice tight and strained.

Captain Hammer always enjoyed the fact that he was right and he loved nothing more than to win, but for some reason, this just seemed wrong. "What do you mean? How?" He asked, his brow knitting and his brain running through the last half hour.

Horrible couldn't stop the eye roll, even if he had wanted to. His throat wasn't burning as much anymore but he till didn't want to test it. He made elaborate gestures of an angry ape like being smashing things, much like King Kong, and then poked Hammer hard in the chest. Trying to say "When you were angry you punched stuff and broke my dish" but in an much more elaborate charades style.

Hammer didn't understand at all what it was that Horrible was trying to say, but was definitely offended. He moved his hands to wrap around Horrible's shoulders and slammed him up against the nearest wall. He managed to balance the bad Doctor on his thighs as his hands gripped tightly onto his skinny shoulders.

Horrible tried leaning away from the large body leaning over him, but it was impossible. He was literally stuck between a rock and a hard place, just this rock has a lower IQ. He needed to distract Hammer, and fast. He didn't even know that he _had_ a plan let alone was ready to put one into action until it was way too late.

It was the best first kiss he'd ever had with anyone, their eyes were open, their lips were firm straight lines and he was still pinned against a wall. But, he definitely couldn't say it was his worst. He kept their lips pressed for as long as could, even pushing forward as Hammer started to pull back. But, even though this was so he could try and think up a way out of this it backfired on him, as all his plans ever do. Typical. His mind was completely and totally blank. The only things floating fleetingly through his mind were the thought of just how hard Hammer's lips were and just how weird it was that he oddly liked the fact that they weren't soft. He'd probably be disappointed if Hammers lips were soft and plump.

Captain Hammer's mind, on the other hand, was whirling at a mile a minute. He absolutely no idea what it was that he was supposed to be doing in this situation. He knew he should be reacting but he just didn't know how, he thought possibly he ought to do it in the negative, roughing Horrible up a bit more, but he really didn't feel like it. He liked the kiss. He liked Horrible.

Hammer finally found the will to pull his head back, forcing himself not to whimper as Horrible followed him and kept their lips pressed together. He pulled back just a fraction more, hardly out of Horrible's reach, and panted lightly as he continued to Stare in Horrible's deep blue eyes. He narrowed his gaze and tilted his head. "Oh..."

i_Oh?_/i What the-? What was 'oh' supposed to mean? How was Horrible supposed to react to that? Was he supposed to? Horrible decided that, seeing as he had no idea how to react, he simply wouldn't. He smile, nodded and avoided eye contact.

Hammer stared at him for a long time, his eyes flickering and his eyelashes fluttering. His eyes kept switching from glaring into baby blues to a long expanse of porcelain skin on the Doctors neck. Horrible couldn't help but feel pressured under the heavy gaze and his body couldn't help but twitch under the scrutiny.

Horrible squeaked as rough, chapped lips placed delicate butterfly across the delicate skin of his neck and breathed hot air across his sensitised flesh. The captain got far into it, his tongue flickering out and tasting the skin, teeth soon joining it to scrape teasingly in light zigzag patterns.

"Hammer!" He gasped out loudly.

Hammer pulled back and blinked up at Horrible in annoyance as though he'd just been interrupted from something very important. "What?" His eyes questioned as he moved his head up to stare at Horrible, his eyes still conveying their confused annoyance and his lips settled in a thick pout.

Horrible couldn't say a word to that. He honestly had no idea what to say to that face. So he didn't, he simply leant forward just enough to close the gap between their lips. He squealed slightly as Hammer pushes his tongue forward, licking a soft line across his thick top lip and begging for entrance. Entrance that Horrible willingly gave.

Hammer's thick, gloved fingers, working their way around under Horrible's pure white lab coat and down the lean back. He pushed his tongue past the slowly opening barrier of pillowed lips and deep into the willing mouth moving against the tongue inside.

Horrible moans and bucks his hip as Hammer tilts his head and deepens their kiss, his tongue reaching little spots behind his gums he didn't even know could be sensitive. Then again, it had been a _long_ while since he'd had any. He can't help but roll his hips into Hammers, oddly not put off at all by the hard cock throbbing against his inner thigh, but rather spurred on by it.

One of Hammer's hands moves to cup a handful of beautifully round bottom an knead it, causing Horrible's hips to meet his at a mush quicker, harsher rate. His other hand works it way back out from beneath Horrible's coat and shirt, before tearing at the large buttons on the coat. Once he finally has the coat open, his hand makes quick work at tearing Horrible's black under-shirt right off his body, leaving just shreds of material behind that soon make their way to the floor like their fallen brethren.

Horrible groans as his tee-shirt is ripped off him, frowning as a perfectly good shirt is completely ruined. But all is soon forgiven as Hammer does that i_thing/i_ with his tongue. Damn where the hell did he learn to roll it like that. He tilts his head and pushes forward, needing, craving more closeness as his hands scramble at Hammer's tee-shirt needing that removed yesterday.

Hammer's eyes flicker downwards slightly at the pulling motion barely there on his chest. He pulls back from the kiss, throws his shirt over his head before dropping it unseeingly on the floor somewhere over there. He'll find it later. His eyes linger on Horrible's milky chest for a second too long and he blushes as his hand pulls his white lab coat back up to sit properly on his shoulders. "Keep that on." He commands, as though Horrible could do anything without his permission. And help.

Horrible nods dumbly as his hands spread out flat against Hammer's broad and muscular chest. Two sets of eyes follow his hands as they move lower down his long body, down over his pectorals, his abs, his thin gloved fingers of one hand following the soft thatch of hair leading down into hidden depths. Horrible moves his eyes to lock onto Hammers, staring deep into each others gaze. Neither breathed as Horrible's nimble hands made quick work of Hammers belt buckle and fly before it slipped past the thin barrier of material.

Hammer hissed as cold leather came into contact with the over heated flesh of his erection, his hips bucking into the far too gentle touch. He groans and shuts his eyes as the hand begins to slowly tighten and move. He leans forward and attacks Horrible's lips once again with his own, pushing his tongue instantly in to tangle with Horrible's. His hands both move in unison to pull at Horrible's trousers, but thanks to a particularity well thought out flick and pull of Horrible's wrist, Hammer ends up tearing those off too with a long moan. The fact that Horrible decided to go commando today was just a little added bonus to make him smile.

"I haven't been to laundrette in a while, okay?" Doctor Horrible grumbles out, blushing and looking away, as he pulls his hand out from the confines of Hammer's boxers. He tries his hardest not to think about the reason and wraps his long, slim legs tightly around Hammer's hips to get the man that little bit closer to himself.

Hammer laughs lightly and tilts Horrible's chin up to him with a hooked finger, "Perfect." He purrs out before closing the gap between their teeth again, the kiss is too slow, soft, careful, and that's it. For the both of them. It's no longer lust filled and excusable. They were going to fuck and they both well knew it. There was no going back now. Not that either of them wanted to, of course.

Before Horrible could start thinking too much about the backwards connotations of how serious this step could be and that they might possibly have just take far too many strides out of the realm of frienemies and way into some kind of twisted relationship, Hammer was stealing his lips in another one of those amazingly fiery kisses and suddenly it didn't really matter anymore.

Hammer, using his thighs still to keep Horrible balanced and lips still moving against the his nemesis, he uses his one free hand to shove into his trousers pocket and pull out a small tube of Vaseline, his loose trousers instantly hitting the floor. He pulls his hand up to his mouth and bites on the end of a finger of the glove and pulls before spitting out randomly next to him, keeping eye contact with Horrible the entire time. He refuses their lips together as he flicks the cap off easily with his thumb and pours a liberal amount over his fingers before moving them around to stir at Horrible's hole.

Doctor Horrible doesn't know what's happening until a cold finger is pushing against his muscles and slipping into his searing insides. He squeals in panic at the intrusion, his eyes flying open and his fists tightening their hold on Hammer's t-shirt. He pulls back from the kiss, wincing and whimpering in pain as the intruding finger pushes father in.

"Relax, Doc." Hammer whispers, his lips brushing gently against Horrible's ear. He waits it out as Horrible takes in several deep breaths and forces his body to relax before he starts to push the finger in again. He begins to slowly swirl it round as he pushes it in and out. He soon has Horrible open enough to push in a second finger along side the first and uses it to start to really stretch out Horrible's entrance. He spreads his finger whilst their deep inside and twists, as soon as he can twist comfortably he begins the same thrusts with his fingers.

After the initial painful burn and awkwardness has gone, Horrible has to admit it isn't actually all that bad. He wasn't sure if he liked it yet, but by the way that Hammer's cock throbbed in his hands, he was sure that he did and i_that/i_ was Incredibly hot. As he concentrate d more and more on the organ humping into his gloved hands instead of the pain, the more he actually enjoyed it. It wasn't long before he was actually bucking back onto the fingers in excitement to have this huge thing up inside him.

Hammer manages in a third finger, seemingly without the bad Doctor even knowing, and might just die if he doesn't get inside this amazing man soon. The tight ringers squeeze around his finger and he's moaning loudly, as if to reiterate the point just that little bit more. He mashes their mouths together and pulls his fingers out of Horrible, swallowing the low whimper of loss that the Doctor lets slip against his tongue.

Horrible moves his hands from Hammer's cock to his hips and pushes the pesky boxers away to the floor. He then squeezing onto Hammer's strong shoulders and takes several deep breaths, knowing that this is going to hurt like hell. Hammer was a lot bigger than his fingers. The Hammer is my penis, indeed.

Hammer lifts Horrible up and nudges his cock at his entrance, smearing pre cum up and down the cleft of his beautiful ass. "You ready for me baby?" He purrs into Horrible's sensitive ear as he moves the lube he kept in his other hand into his free hand. At the sign of the Doctor's sharp nod, he pours a liberal amount over his cock before lining it up to Horrible's hole and grunting as he pushes his hips slowly forward.

Horrible cries out in pain as the intense burn runs up from his ass through his hips and up his spine. His fingers dig into the hard muscles as he forces himself to try and relax, tears forming in the corners of his eyes. He whimpers out Hammer's name as the pain lessens slightly and he takes a few more, unsteady breaths.

Captain Hammer goes cross-eyed and moans loudly when the tight heat engulfs him further as Horrible finally starts to relax. He could come undone right then and there, buried balls deep inside his arched nemesis, but he doesn't. He fights all instincts to start pounding in and out instantly and just waits.

Horrible pants as he feels the large sac rest against the soft flesh of his arse and i_damni_ does it feel good. To be so completely filled, to be as close as one can be to another person. Using what little upper body strength he has, Horrible, very slowly and carefully, raised his hips up until just the large head of Hammer's impressive cock was resting inside him before then working his way back down again.

Hammer stood, slack jawed, head tossed back, eyes screwed shut and breathless as the incredible feeling sends shudders and waves of pleasure fry his entire nervous system. He continues on from Horrible, continuing the agonizingly slow place.

Just as Horrible thought he was finally used to the slow burn, Hammer began speeding up and that's when he really started to feel it. But, the oddest thing was, the pain blurred and just roared a soft fire low in the pit of his stomach that flared with every steady stroke of Hammer's hips. His nails scratch down the thick flesh of Hammer's chest before sliding his palms back up again. Moans humming out between lips sealed shut.

Hammer looks up into Horrible's face as the man begins bouncing in his lap, meeting him near thrust for thrust and intensifying the pleasure. That won't do, he thinks to himself as he watches Doctor Horrible forcibly swallow and hold back his moans. He lifts his hand to Horrible's mouth and, after several seconds of confused blinking, Horrible sank in his teeth and yanked the glove off Hammers hand. Hammer smirked as he moved to grip onto Horrible's hips tightly with both hands and really started slamming home deep inside his enemy.

Horrible couldn't hold it any more and he started to sing his pleasure out loudly. Each moan louder than the last as Hammer starting driving harder, rougher and shallower into him. His nails dug into Hammer's shoulder as he tossed his head back and starting repeating Hammer's name in a soft mantra. He was so close and he didn't give a crap if it was embarrassingly soon, Hammer knew what he was doing.

Captain Hammer leant up and trailed hot, wet kisses all over Doctor Horrible's chest. He smirked as he arrived at a small, hard nipple and thought to himself 'If the rest of Horrible is a sensitive as a girl then...'. He taking into his mouth and sucking, teasing it with his teeth and tongue.

Horrible's hands scramble on the wall behind him to find anything at all to grab onto that will stable himself, in lac of anything he simply threads his gloved fingers through his hair and arches his back. He moans loudly as he's bounced further up the wall and his fingers tug lightly at his own blonde strands.

Hammer growls, low and primal, as he watches the pornographic show. He loves the flushed face, the closed eyes, the head thrown back, the long pale neck and the stark contrast between whit lab coat and flushed, tanned skin. It was the single most sexiest thing that he had ever seen. And he wanted to see it again.

Then that's it. Horrible is screaming gibberish, his vision blurring and whiting out as his head is completely emptied of all thoughts. It's the most intense orgasm he's ever had in his life and he's painting Hammer's stone stomach with it. He thanks the sound proofing that Hammer's lips supply as they lap over his but he doesn't have the brain function yet to participate in it.

Hammer really doesn't care how messy the kiss is, he just needs it. Then, the squeezing, rippling pressure of Horrible's anal muscles as Hammer forces him over the edge has him coming in seconds. With one last pulsating thrust as deep as he can go, Hammer blows his seed deep inside his arch nemesis and all around bad guy.

As soon as Hammer can breath and open his eyes again, he places a small kiss on Horrible's sweaty brow before pulling himself out with a wince. He slowly fights to lower Horrible back down to his feet again, having slight trouble with unwrapping the man's legs from around his back but eventually does.

Horrible's knees instantly give way as soon as he puts weight on them and he just collapses, boneless, to the floor and winces at the throbbing in his hips and ass. His chest heaves with the effort of breathing and his heart is thumping roughly against his rib cage, adrenaline pumping through his veins. His eyes follow every tiny movement of Hammer's body, every flex of muscle and every twitch of hair.

Hammer moves himself to the wall and slides his back down it until he's sitting next to the tired heap of Doctor. He smiles and his heart very nearly melts at the sight of the wild haired and flushed face man. He has to turn his head away to stop himself from doing or saying something completely stupid.

"Billy." Horrible pants as he stares up into Hammer's dark, chocolate eyes.

Hammer's heart thumps and his whole being contorts with a mixture of rage and aching. He knows that this probably wasn't anything and that Horrible is a bad guy, but mentioning another guys name right in the midst of after glow? That's just cruel.

Horrible smiles and laughs lightly, the sound heaven to Hammer's ears as he turns and stares back into impossibly blue eyes. "My name is Billy."

Hammer's eyes widen and his mouth hangs slack. Guess this thing meant more than nothing. It meant a lot of something. Everything. Hammer's whole face breaks into a huge grin as he scoops the man up into his arms and places kisses all over his face. "Nice t'meet ya, Billy. My name is...

_**THE END!**_


End file.
